L ena

On facebook on December 28th, 2019. I joined the Facebook group. I wrote in that group on September 2nd, 2019 I was looking for a friend. I didn't want a boyfriend at that time. I noticed that the second comment said, "I am here friend.'' I didn't know who that was. I thought that was his real name Ali Sharmeen but it wasn't because it was a nickname. It's not his real name. He hardly told me about himself in the beginning on September 5th, 2019; is when things got fast going into the relationship after becoming friends for only 3 days.

He caught me off guard when he said,

"I love you."

I wasn't expecting that because he and I hardly knew each other. My relationship with him was rushed; on November 14th, 2019 I was his fiance, and that was quick. However, wouldn't talk about marriage a lot with me. I remember the very first time he and I video-chatted on messenger. It was 6 months together, in March 2020. He hid his face, he put his arm over his face. He told me that he was shy, I saw him with his cousin. Then he got over his shyness; I thought he was cute, everything went great and so wonderful at first. I would send my pictures first, and then he would do the same. He wanted me to reply fast, and I told him that he needs to do the same. When I got to know him, he told me that his father passed away when he was young, but he never did tell me what age his dad passed away. He used to sing and was in a band, I don't know if that was true or not. He had a guitar that he would have with him.

When I would video chat with him, I hardly ever saw his mom and his little sister on video call. They weren't around, and he told me that they were shy, I don't know if that was just an excuse, but I think that was because I noticed he didn't show the video call when he was talking to someone. He was doing something when I didn't look at the video chat. I don't know what he was doing. My family didn't like him because they told me, "He could be a scammer." "He's not real." I had his pictures developed. He is from Mitha Tiwana, Pakistan. He told me that his grandfather taught him the Persian language when he was a kid. He improved his English just for me. I could understand what he was saying because his English was great. He wanted me to learn Urdu. He wanted me to be a Muslim. My family didn't allow that.

When he asked me for money every month, he would tell me that he had to use it for his school fees, and he never told me when he graduated high school. He went to work, he wouldn't tell me how much he would make. He worked two jobs, he got sick because he worked hard. I never knew that because he thought that I would be worried about him.

I always thought that he was just using me for money

since he always asked me every month.

It felt like he was taking advantage of me. He told me that I was wrong because he loved me and he appreciated the help. He was struggling badly, he was upset because his mom was in the hospital, but he never showed a picture of her hand. He told me that she had diabetes, and one time he was in the hospital because he had kidney stones. He has diabetes, and I learned about the economy in Pakistan. I told him that I heard bad things about Pakistanis, I won't forget one time he told me why would he kill me. He wouldn't kill or harm me if I went to Pakistan. He wanted me to go to Pakistan, he wanted to marry me.

He wasn't planning on coming to my country, he wanted me to live with him in Pakistan. He told me that he cared about me, but his actions showed that he didn't care about me. The most hurtful were the bad words that he called me, while I was in a relationship with him. That was the worst part of it because he was angry with me a lot. He wanted me to reply fast. He would be upset with me all the time. He didn't like when I talked to others because he hated that. I wouldn't have thought that he would say anything like that but I was very shocked. It seemed like he was the one who changed a lot. He wasn't the sweet guy that I had known back in 2019.

He told me that he wasted 5 years, he wasn't happy. I wasn't happy to be with him anymore either. He didn't have a Pakistani passport. I noticed that he posted something on another girl's Facebook. He told her that he loved her, he put "I love uhh" then he wrote the same thing to me on WhatsApp in the same text as he texted that girl on Facebook; I knew it was him. I didn't know who that girl was, but I knew that he was cheating on me. I left him a few times, he didn't make me happy. All he was doing was just begin upset with me. Then I remember that one time he messaged me and thought I was cheating on him and having sex with a different guy, but I wasn't doing that. He sent me another's girls picture to me, he told me that he would have sex with her. He was using manipulation on me, which made me feel unloved by him because I didn't deserve that.

On September 8th, 2024, he was the one who didn’t want to talk to me. Feeling hurt, I deactivated my WhatsApp. After that, he called and messaged me, but none of his attempts went through—he knew I had blocked him. Later, he sent me screenshots of the messages he had written. At that point, I thought we had broken up, and I was already feeling sad because my uncle had passed away.

On December 28th, 2024, he told me that once he got a new phone, he would write to me. However, when January 2025 came, he never reached out. He was the one who left me. He didn’t wish me a happy birthday or send a video like he did the previous year. Instead, he blamed me for deactivating WhatsApp—when in reality, he was the one who deactivated his account, then blocked me when he returned. I hadn’t even realized it at the time. He was sneaky.

Then, in February 2025, I noticed that he had added me on Snapchat. He pretended not to know who I was, but deep down, I knew he still remembered me. I didn’t reach out to him until February 10th, 2025. During our conversation, he told me he had deleted everything. That was when I decided to delete everything too. Our breakup became permanent, and we finally got the closure we needed. We both learned from our mistakes and agreed that it was time to move on. Now, I’m healing. I don’t talk to him anymore, and I’ve blocked him on Snapchat. He lied to me so many times, but I’m just grateful that I’ll never go back to him. I’m completely done with him for good. He was controlling and never wanted me to talk to anyone.

But now, I’m free,

and I’m thankful for that.